Hello Elastic My Old Friend . . .

Dear ones,

Megarita is pregnant. As in "with child." As in "expecting." As in "in the family way." As in "knocked up, well and truly." My husband and I are having a little girl in the new year, but in the meantime I've got to dress my strangely rotund self.

To write about the weirdness of having one's body hijacked by an entity I affectionately call "the wee parasite" is a whole other post entirely, so today I'll just stick to "Dressing The Bump." Because my southeastern home has been obscenely hot all of September, my back to school wear has by and large been me crammed into wrap dresses and sundresses and praying for fabric strength. As soon as it cools off, I will be resplendent in elastic waisted cords from Old Navy. (Once and Future Pregs: Old Navy Maternity is Fabulous and Inexpensive.)

I will say that my fashion requirements are far looser now. Comfort uber alles. When you're carrying around pounds extra and your balance is off and you actually cannot fit your pudgy feet into attractive shoes, the bar is just lowered. And that's ok.

Exhibit A: work wear
Forgive the bathroom pics. I cannot seem to make the camera work on its own and my husband is being very cagey about being my photographer. So here I am in one of my workhorse wrap dresses. This dress (from Max Azaria's low end label) has NO business being stretched around me, and yet it's too hot to do anything else. So I lash myself to the mast (or at least say a prayer to my knot tying abilities and the tensile strength of man-made fabrics) and toodle off to work. I wore mules earlier in August, but now we're firmly in ballet flats. (Side note -- I recommend a clog or a better sole/heel. Ballet flats are not great for backs, I'm finding.) Also necessary -- the camisole under the dress. I never wore camis before as a layering device, because my breasts were never that obtrusive. That, my friends, has changed. The name of the game is containment and preventing undesirable sexual harassment lawsuits. Camis away.

Exhibit B: non-work wear
This is an Old Navy advertisement that they might not wish to have. I'm wearing a maternity top (size small) and Old Navy skinny maternity jeans (size 8 long). These jeans are awesome, largely because I can wear something that isn't a pup tent that still has enough strength to not be chafey or binding. I have never ever bought or worn skinny jeans to this point in my 3o+ years, but here we are. I might have worn this outfit in middle school, to be honest.

A note about sizing. I was a size 6 before this experience, so you go with your normal(ish) size for maternity clothes, by and large. My rump has grown, so I'm back up to an 8. Maternity stuff ranges HUGELY. This is a small and it's tent-y. I have other tops that are the same size and seem clingy.

As I continue to expand and the weather (please baby jesus) continues to cool, I'll share more worky pregnant clothes. I've got a conference early next month, actually, that I'm completely unsure about. I might just swaddle myself in knits, throw on some big earrings and a scarf, and say to hell with it all.

Yours in robust Rubenesqueness,
Megarita (& Sprout)