Best Things I’ve Heard in the Hot Box, or Why the Dialogue is Best Taught by Teachers With a Good Sense of Humor

Bikram teachers put up with the silliest moments!

Photo Via DaveAustria on Flickr.

Not that you'd expect it, but hot yoga can be a pretty funny experience sometimes. You get silly sounds coming from super-sweaty yogis, odd characters running in and out of the room, and general chaos and mayhem on those crowded days.

Here are a few of my favorite moments from the Hot Box that I'd like to share. What memories do you cherish from Bikram's Torture Chamber?

• “Wow, whose red panties are these?” (*Teacher holds up pair of red hot, lacy underwear in front of class with wide-eyed look on his face.) “Alright, well I guess I’ll keep them up here on the podium. I feel like they’re a little Christmas present that someone’s left for me. I guess it’s Christmas in July!”

• “You’re not babies; you’re warriors. So don’t act like a baby in here. Next set!”

• “Hey, Steve! I have an idea…how about you wait ‘til after class to take a shower? Yeah, I saw that, the water bottle action. You thought you could sneak it by me, but you forget: I see all in here…”

• “Have you noticed you’re twitching your fingers during triangle pose? I mean, it’s kind of cute, but it has to stop. We can’t have that in here.”

• “Is that a purse? Is that your purse, miss? Is there a cell phone in that purse?” *Yogi nods her head, blushing a bit. “OK, well no worries, but just remember next time to leave it outside the room. Alright, let’s start pranayama…” *Pause. “You know what? As it turns out, I can’t have a phone in here. It’s just wrong. Here, I’m just going to set it outside at the front desk…” *Teacher starts dialogue as he walks out the door...

• "Face to the legs, upper body to the thighs, like a grilled cheese sandwich..." (Why would you want to eat a Japanese ham sandwich anyway?! Grilled cheese all the way. :)
  

• "Close your mouth. Close your mouth. Close your mouth." *Yogi still exhales loudly through an open mouth. "Man, people need to work on their manners in this class!"

Yogis is crazy, man.
Photo Via NerdVin on Flickr.